“Acceptance” seems to be one of those buzz words du jour – we have to “accept” one another; “accept” the current moment; and of course “accept the things we cannot change,” from 12-step literature. But what does acceptance really mean? And what does it look like?
Both Eastern and Western figures have been talking about acceptance for thousands of years – we know this from religious texts, philosophical writings, literary authors, and more recently from those who study psychology and personal transformation.
*This blog was originally written for the Grateful Heart Holistic Therapy Center’s Blog.
A Change Is Gonna Come. You know, that Sam Cooke song from the 1960s that was covered by everyone from Al Green and Tina Turner to the Fugees and Leela James? Cooke croons, “It’s been a long, a long time coming but I know a change gonna come.” And whether you greet change with open arms or with paralyzing terror, the truth is, it’s gonna come regardless. And if we go way back, I mean WAY back, Heraclitus in Ancient Greece was attributed to saying, “Nothing endures but change.” In other words, the only constant is change.
“Rebellion”: I think French Revolution, bayonets, chaos in the streets, the masses rising up in the face of injustices perpetuated for far too long. I imagine overt, gruesome details of foreign movie notoriety – the kind of violence that actually keeps you awake at night, not the sensationalized world of special effects. To me, rebellion connotes class warfare, slave revolts, and the overdue response to oppression and persecution. Rebels seem courageous, romanticized, morally-motivated risk takers (if they’re on the right side of history). They’re the Tiananmen Square protesters of 1989; the Buddhist monks in Myanmar; the Harriet Tubmans and Rosa Parks’ of the world. They believe in a cause more than they fear death, and the status quo won’t do.
My supervisor, Marsha Hiller (MFT #30216), is forming a parents’ process group to begin in January. It will be an exploration for parents to transform old family patterns by looking at the legacy of how they were parented. Some of the issues that will be addressed will be school pressures, setting limits, self-regulation (both yours and your children’s), balancing adult needs and children’s needs, and much more.
The group will meet on Thursday evenings in North Berkeley, and for more information, the flyer is below. The group is open to parents with children of any age.
Joining the 21st century, I’ve created a Facebook page for my therapy practice: http://www.facebook.com/HolisticGardner1. I plan to post articles and tidbits about psychology and related material.
Please “like” us if you’re interested in following the updates.
The Facebook page will NEVER compromise the client-therapist confidentiality laws that are so integral to the profession.
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